We fill the bags Christmas morning, after we open our gifts.
With an assembly line of little and big hands, we stuff small paper sacks with water bottles, granola bars and white athletic socks. We include a verse about God’s love on one side of a notecard, a hand-drawn picture of a person in a field of flowers, in a sailboat or under happy sky on the other.
While we work, we talk about care for the hurting, tell the stories again about God’s greatest gift in his Son, share about the giving-blessing and grace.
Then we pile up the bags and say a prayer for those who will receive one.
God, would you use our act of love to help someone see they are special to You?
Would you use a small bag to help someone believe that their needs matter, that they are valuable?
We dress for our Christmas day festivities and load the sacks into our car so we’ll have one handy whenever we see “someone with a sign asking for help,” as our littlest says.
Over the weeks, we give filled paper to men, women, young, old. To people with dogs on chains, standing by backpacks and plastic bags, holding hand-written words on cardboard.
I pass a bag out the driver’s window, say something about “here’s a snack and a pair of socks, God bless you.” I feel like I’m using an eyedropper to fill the Pacific.
All this suffering I don’t understand.
And we say a prayer that God would hold him, hold her, take small and multiply. Amen.
Last week, I pulled off the freeway and up to the corner and saw her.
Head low bent, hunched shoulders, greasy hair nearly covering her face, she held a sign that read “Homeless. Need help.”
As we approached the end of the off-ramp, I reached to the floor of the car to pick up a sack and rolled down the window to hand it to her. From her profile, she might have been my age, but looked like she’d lived many pain-filled lifetimes.
She looked up, and her eyes met mine.
Water blues and earth browns locked, and she began to cry “thank you, thank you.” And we held our gaze, and for a moment her pain became mine, and her thanks made me feel embarrassed and sorrowful and grateful to give, all tangled inside.
“God bless you,” I said. “I hope this helps a little.”
She clutched the bag to her chest, and as we pulled away, I saw her look inside.
As I drove, I imagined her fingering the contents. Taking in her hand the picture J made with such care and reading the words,
“God is with you always.”
And I imagined her thinking for even that moment, He is with me.
I am seen. God sees me.
I hope another day leathered hands might pull that notecard from her backpack as she sits by the side of the road.
Looking at hope words and a fat-tipped marker-aquamarine sky — so different than this gray pavement and the roar of semis, smell of exhaust and dirt coating hurt skin — maybe she will feel deep pain remembering the girl she once was or hate again this corner where she stands in the rain.
But perhaps, maybe it could remind her of love?
Blue eyes below meeting sky above.
We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! 1 Corinthians 13:12 (Message)
Connecting through the power of stories written, spoken and lived
Goodness gracious, beautiful words to read this morning! Thank you! What a sweet example you are teaching your girls!
Thank you so much, Christy.
This is so lovely and such a wonderful idea!
Thanks, Cori. I so appreciate your comment.
Your words are stars, pearls, downy feathers, tears. This piece is so profoundly beautifully written. But it’s the message – THAT breaks my heart wide open! I haven’t words. but such love.
Oh Mama, thank you. I am touched that you would see my words in these ways. You bless me, on and on and on.
thanks for a fine way to start my week…love your words and what they give to me.
Thank you so much, Martha. I so appreciate your words, too.
What a lovely example you are setting for your children. The World would be a better place if we all did that. Thank you for the reminder, and the gift of expression you have from God. I love you, Ashley!
Thank you, Aunt Claudia. We all do the small things we can, right? I love you and so appreciate your words.
I think this post is one of my favorites!!! You guys are amazing. what a great idea. so beautiful.
Thanks so much, Maria!
Ashley, I was so moved by this story. On one of my trips to Texas, I was clearing out the back of dani’s car and grabbed a box of brown lunch bags. Ania, or Sophie, cannot remember which, grabbed my arm and asked me to put them back, that they are for people who have no homes. Whichever girl, had such compassion and concern on her face. Until reading “seen, which is so perfectly titled, I hadn’t heard a recipient story. The love in the air in your home I spoke of, goes right out the front door with you.
Debbie, thank you! I loved reading your experience and imagining the beautiful look of compassion on your granddaughter’s face. That is one of the greatest gifts…to see that understanding coming to a little one. :) Thank you so much for sharing.
I haven’t had luck getting your posts onto my email. Only have my phone in new York. I would love it if I could though :)
Sorry it’s been giving you difficulties. Please let me know if you have problems once you get to your computer. I do think that’s the easiest way to sign up, though I can lead you through the process on your phone if you’d like. If you want to do that, please just let me know.
I love the way you ‘plan’ ahead in a sense, to meet people less fortunate armed with goods to sustain body and soul. Excellent.
Once, I pulled off I-5 with a load of autos going to Broadway Ford. At the end of the ramp I spotted “someone with a sign asking for help,” and resolved to forego my afternoon pop and offer the dollar instead to the person with the sign. As he turned to walk away, something made me say, “Bob?” which stopped him. “Bob ___?” He turned smiling as the light turned green, and said, “Don CALLAS!?! Oh man, I’ve always loved you man!” Our hands clasped together for such a short time, but the love, support and compassion that flowed in our eyes, seemed to go on much longer. And with that, our reunion was cut short. But that gift, an affirmation, he gave me that day was much bigger than the dollar I gave him and, has stayed with me ever since.
He gave me a feeling of worth, which is what you pass out in the brown bags. I applaud you!
Don, that’s an INCREDIBLE story! What a reminder it is to us that we humans can start out in similar places, and who knows for what tiny or enormous reasons, our paths take us into such different lives. And a reminder too that that one holding the sign on the corner is our “neighbor” – and our “friend” – too! Thank you for sharing that beautiful memory! xo
Don, thank you so much for your story! It brought tears to my eyes. I love what you shared about the gift of the giving, how much you received in that affirmation from an old friend. A boy you once knew in need who you gave to, who in turn gave to you. Affirming the worth in each other to the other. How beautiful. Thank you again for this!
Beautifully written and a good reminder of how something as simple as your “brown bags” has the potential to give someone “hope” and the knowledge that “they are loved!”
Thank you so much for your comments, Becca. :)
This post moved me to tears and will move me to action. Our family will implement a brown bag blessing of our own. Thank you for sharing this perspective, this wisdom, this love.
Oh, thank you, Sissy. That makes me so happy. Thanks so much for your words.
Thank you Ashley. I hit subscribe, then follow, and word press appeared asking for a username & password. I got a word press notification in my email, but didn’t fill out username or password. Must I?
Hi Deb.
So here’s the easiest way…If you go to “Follow Draw Near Via Email” on the left side of the page (from a computer you will see it this way, or you can scroll to the very bottom of your smart phone when you’re on Draw Near and click “View Full Site,” then it will show you that “Follow Draw Near Via Email” option at the bottom of the page, in the footer).
Then you will click “follow” under “Follow Draw Near…” It should just have you enter your email. When you do that, you will receive an email asking you to confirm your subscription. Simply click “confirm” and you should be good to go. Let me know if that still isn’t working for you.
Thanks for your persistence. :)
Thank you – got the confirmation :). Cannot wait to get my first email. I will stay current this way. I miss reading your blog and benefitting from your perspectives when away from draw mear for too long. Xo
You’re a subscriber. Glad we got that figured out…phew! :)
Ashley this story brought tears to my eyes and an awareness to me thats pretty profound. I can’t imagine why you would ever internalize anything negative about yourself. I, on the other hand, believe myself to be a caring, sympathetic and emphathic person of understanding but put no effort into trying to make a personal difference. What a wonderful example you are setting for your children and above all else what a wonderful example you are setting for me!! love and kisses Kim
You have always embodied love, joy and kindness to me, Kim. I’m sure there are so many moments a day when you bring light and love to someone who needs it, without you even knowing it. It’s simply who you are.
You represent what giving is all about-all who replied were deeply touched by your simple acts of absolute beauty- Selflessness,compassion and empathy instilled in the girls by you and Mike will forever be an integral part of who they are. You have my respect and admiration.
I’m blessed by your words. Thank you, Papa.
There you go again fully utilizing the instrument that you are. Don’t look now but your dimensions are showing.
Pop, I am so touched by all your comments. Thank you for both the time you took to read my posts and the beautiful words you’ve shared with me here. I’m so appreciative.
Ashley, I read this when you first published it and intended to comment but got swept away with motherhood instead. I just wanted to let you know that I have continued to think of it and am inspired by the way you are demonstrating a life of loving and service to your girls in the everyday.
Thank you so much for sharing that with me, Kathi.
Lovely, Ashley. I have done this in the past and you’ve rekindled the drive to do so again. I love how you get the kids involved and also tie it to Christmas. The whole post is beautifully written, particularly the section with the woman. So compelling. Glad you linked to it. :)