Mama did empathy and compassion. Like breathing, that was what she did.
Bending low, beautiful browns cresting tears, she’d say, “Oh, honey, that sounds so hard. How did that make you feel?”
And you’d sense her taking in the turns of your eyes and mouth, the furrow in your brow that matched hers and know you mattered.
I learned words like overwhelmed and sad, joyous and confused, and I learned to hold them, and over time, not too tightly, for they were meant to give away.
And I knew this partly because of that question she’d ask — the one that got right under my skin and caused me to look at that mean, annoying girl with fresh eyes.
“How do you think that made her feel?”
I remember literally trying to put myself into that girl’s body and imagine what she saw and felt, and it made me frustrated, but it made me me.
I learned that girl had a story, too, and she might be hurt and scared like I was, but also her story was not mine.
I learned all are broken. That life itself is a broken, imperfect glory gift, and in mercy bending low, we show that all lives matter. Mama taught that suffering meant something and it need never be lived alone.
Joining up again today with the Five Minute Friday community of friends over at Lisa-Jo‘s where we write for five minutes, refrain from extreme editing and encourage one another freely. Today began with the prompt: WHAT MAMA DID. Would you like to join us?

What an incredible gift she gave you and consequently, us. Good stuff, Ashley.
Thanks for sharing! :)
Thank you for joining me here. :)
There is this constant stream of beautiful flowing from your life rivers. What a tender tribute to the one who gave you life. Lovely, always
I’ll tell you what, I’m gonna be a better mama after reading all these wonderful tributes to motherhood. Your mama is an absolute blessing! Thanks for sharing her with us here.
I hear you, Tanya. I’ve learned so much about being a mama (and a woman) through the gift of all these bloggers! Thanks so much for your words, too, that bless my blessing mama.
That is beautiful. I loved this line: “I learned all are broken. That life itself is a broken, imperfect glory gift, and in mercy bending low, we show that all lives matter.” What a beautiful mother.
Thank you, K. I truly appreciate you visiting and reading about my beautiful mama.
Oh Ashley
Your mother was a wise woman and so beautiful! You look so much like her. I never had such a relationship with my mother. You are truly blessed!
Much love, dear friend
Mia
What a beautiful tribute, and she knew how to express her thoughts. Love, grams
Sent from my iPad
I have two long continuous tears streaming. Probably too soon to comment, but…
How do you think that made me feel?…
; )
I adore you, dearest girl! adore! mama
I’ll try to guess. :) I adore you, too, Mama.
Your writing is so consistent, Ashley ! Always beautiful words chosen that tickle, poke or caress.. in a healing, blessed way…..my own heart. Thank you once again. Could comment on every blog but just don’t. I’ve been ‘in love’ with your sweet sister Ali for several years……now I realize another daughter of Spree’s has entrenched herself near my soul also ! Blessings. mary
Bless you, Mary. What dear words…how I appreciate them. My sister is an amazing woman. I love that she’s got you loving on her when she lives way too far away from my mama and me. I look forward to meeting you someday. xoxo
Such a lovely post–honoring your mother and inspiring your readers.
I’m going to pretend it took you at least twenty minutes to write this because my goodness…the beauty. What a gift she gave you, and what a gift your words give her back.
‘mercy bending low’…..love that!! You need to copyright that…otherwise I may just steal that…
xxx
No words right now. Just what is always here when I read you…tears, warmth, goosebumps, awe. a heart more open, more full.
Oh, the gift of your mom. Of you.
I’m all gushy love here.
Thank you for sharing just a piece of your mom with us. I love that she was all about the feelings of all.
I love what you say here, Amy, because we are all so much more than can be encapsulated in 5 minutes or through the examination of just one facet. Thank you for joining me in this space today.
Thank you my sweet sister for drawing my heart back to these places. So blessed for this perspective which has always influenced and guided my relationships. How blessed I am to share some of my most sacred relationships with you and mama.
And Mary Hixson, the feeling is mutual! :)
Xoxo
Thank you, Sissy. You are so right — that perspective of compassion and empathy has influenced and guided us in so much of how we do this life. I’m abundantly grateful to call you my sister and to share these relationships with you and Mama.
Such gracious beauty here! This, I loved: ” That life itself is a broken, imperfect glory gift, and in mercy bending low, we show that all lives matter.” Amen!
Amazing post!
Again, your descriptions are so visual. I have always said that your Mama has an aura around her that supersedes all comfort zones. I adore you both and Ali too!
When I read about your personal experience of your wise and loving Mama, I cannot relate. While my life was not blessed by an earthly mom, I know who held me; our heavenly Father truly does take care of orphans. I recently read Julian of Norwich refer to Jesus as mother “Though an earthly mother may allow her child to perish, our heavenly mother Jesus cannot allow us who are his children to perish; for he and none but he is almighty, all wisdom, and all love.” I rejoice with you as you rejoice in your Mama and I mourn with motherless daughters or daughters who are not in close relationship with their mom.
Susan, I hear your sorrow and it breaks my heart wide open. Yes, dear daughter, the Father does hold the orphans and treasure in ways I cannot comprehend. The fact that you know so well the one who loves and holds you when you did not experience it as you should have from an earthly mother is stunning.
I believe that we can be assured that he, who is moved with compassion, mourned and mourns still with you, abiding now with you in the gaping loss you experienced. Thank you for your words to us, Susan, for giving that picture from Julian of Norwich of Jesus and for sharing your heart. Bless you, dear one as you continue your healing journey.
This is so lovely. What a great quality – empathy – to have internalized from your mom…and you shared it so well. I love this part best: “I learned all are broken. That life itself is a broken, imperfect glory gift, and in mercy bending low, we show that all lives matter. Mama taught that suffering meant something and it need never be lived alone.”
Thank you, Abbey. I so appreciate you being here today.
sounds like an amazing Mama, cuz she sounds a lot like Jesus.
Cheers,
Leah
What a lovely gift you were/are to one another. This is a tribute to her and to you. It is a picture of spiritual maturity. I have often referred to your Mama as “love personified”. Hard to express how much it gripped my soul.